Rx – Has A Certain Symmetry To It

It was the end of a long, long, very long day of writing and my brain felt like oatmeal. Ok, lol, that was a joke.

My brain felt like shit.

Far too often I wake up worried I could have suffered a series of small strokes during the night that wouldn’t necessarily reveel themselves in the way I behave during the day, but would show uop in my righting, and I was at the ned of won of those dayz.

But guess what, I’m a mom, so that means shit brain or not I am on duty 24/7. And when child call out, mama answer.

Today, just as I’d packed it in and was ready to lose myself in a goblet of Castelfino Jaume Serra, I got a text from daughter number 2 reminding me to pick her ADHD meds up from the pharmacy. She said she absolutely could not go without them, and that meant I needed to shelve the liquid narcotics and be a better mom.

I put on some pants, and set off, in my car, to the pharmacy 2 blocks away. Ugh, the exhaustion.

Truth be told I reconsidered driving considering the shape I was in, but decided if I could pull out of the garage successfully I was good to go. Carport extraction successful, I was off.

Here’s where I should mention that the following sequence of events may or may not have had something to do with my not having eaten much in days, thanks to newly self-imposed work productivity goals and the goals my bathroom scale (in cahoots with my jean shorts) had imposed upon me when winter changed to summer and I got fat. Failing at life? Sure, ok. Failing at appearances? I don’t mother-fudging think so! My brain cells would learn to adapt, just like the brains cells of generations before them. That makes no sense to me now, but at the time… the logic was close enough and therefore, acceptable.

Got To the Pharmacy

I got to the pharmacy, stood at the counter, and that’s when I realized my outfit was pret-ty, pret-ty, pret-ty telling. Kind of a depressed housewife meets binner vibe, which kicked off an instant neurotic domino effect.

Overdoing it on my manners to make up for my appearance I was near-treacly with the poor pharmacist when she greeted me. “Hello and good day, madam! I am here on behalf of my daughter to retrieve an Rx – pharmaceuticals to you and me – if I may!” Big apologetic smile.

The pharmacist looked away swiftly and started tapping the required keys on her computer keyboard which is when I realized, to my horror, the promotional placemat sitting on the area’s pickup counter was egregiously off-centre. It was almost on the diagonal! Which was deeply upsetting for me.  

I started straightening the sleeve containing the store’s promotional materials, ensuring it was perfectly aligned with the front of the counter, but not bumping right up next to the edge because what am I, a psychopath? I placed it an estimated half-inch back, and in perfect symmetry with all surrounding edges.

Then, I fixed the digital POS contraption that was also unforgivably askew. I picked it up and placed it in the middle third quadrant so it was easy to reach, and straightened it so it looked nice, and that’s when I noticed the pharmacist standing motionless yet staring at me.

“Have you taken this medication before and is there anything else I can get for you today?” she asked, pretending to forget I said I was there for my daughter, just in case.

“Oh!” I chuckled like a normal person. “No,” I answered. “This is for my daughter, I’m unmedicated.”